Well, today is the big day. Amidst a whole lot of people making “erection” jokes, I’m going to admit I’m a little nervous. As much as pundits all think that their candidate has it in the bag, you never know what could happen on a day like today. I kind of want to skip to tomorrow so we can have done with all this foolishment.
Last Election Day, I barely made it to the poll on time. It’s actually kind of an amusing story. I lived in Chicago and was determined to vote because I had all these hopes and dreams for changing the country and I wasn’t about to let the fact that my voter certificate hadn’t showed up change that. The only problem was that as I worked later and later that day it became increasingly evident that I wasn’t going to be able to make it without some intervention. My relief didn’t show up and since I had no car, I didn’t know how I was going to get to my polling place.
That’s when my friend G stepped in with her car keys and the proclamation that she didn’t need her car back until the next day. So not only could I go to the polling place, I could also go over to S’s place afterward and go get drunk at a dive bar. Not that I would be driving her car there, I hated parking in Chicago.
Ten minutes before the polls closed, I leaped into G’s car and sped off from work with my phone’s GPS blazing. Five minutes before the polls closed, I screeched into a parking space and flung open the door, jumped out and flew into the little building covered in cat hair and sweat. They were taking in the “Vote Here” sign and I was the only person there apart from a little old man who looked like he cast a ballot in the 1912 election.
“Am I too late to vote?” I asked, hoping the answer was no.
“Of course not,” said the woman. “As long as you’re not going to take long.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that,” I said. “I think we both know who I’m voting for.”
After I voted, I was given a sticker for my shirt and a pile of peppermints (they were trying to get rid of them since I was the last voter), then I was sent off into the night to eat vegan hot wings and participate in the smashing of a pinata that had drink coupons in it. I miss dive bars. That was a good night, made even better when Obama won the presidency.
I’m hoping that tonight will be a good night as well. But no matter what your political persuasion, I think there’s one thing we can both agree on: we don’t have to listen to two people argue about who is better/worse for America for another four years. Also no more door knockers, political ads or debates. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think we should get rid of these things, I’m just glad I won’t have to put up with them for another long while.